|Saturday, February 12th, 2011|
I just quit my two, overlapping jobs without a backup plan. It was necessary. But now I'm terrified. My friends have been supportive and generous, which is all I can ask for. The future is completely open. I think the most startling thing about this all is that I'm beginning to heave healthy reactions to things. That feels foreign and new.
|Thursday, January 6th, 2011|
does anyone still read this?
|Tuesday, March 27th, 2007|
|is this thing on
i haven't used this piece in almost a year. i am, in most ways, a different person than i was at the height of my livejournal usage. some practical updates: i'm leaving the job i've had for over three years to return to school full time this summer. i've been taking night classes and i just think that it's time for me to take the plunge back into academia. instead of going the visual art route this time, i'm going with writing. i entertain fantasies abt going on to get my phd in modern poetry but, for now, i'm setting my sights on finishing my BA. i live in the same place and am still dear friends with most of the same people. i can still drink most people under the table but these days i choose to do so perhaps only once a month. i have started a bird taxidermy collection, i got a matching tattoo with my best friend chris garneau
, and i've been a happy lady for a long time now. maybe i'll start hitting this thing more often again, if there's any interest at all.
oh oh oh and i havent had a cigarette in 8 months. somehow that feels like an important update.
|Tuesday, April 18th, 2006|
|Monday, November 28th, 2005|
life updates. nothing has changed at all except the paint job in my room was finally completed and i purchased a taxidermied magpie that currently resides on a shelf at the head of my bed. i am currently looking foward to a cruise to nova scotia in the summer of 06. other than that there is not much to speak of.
|Saturday, August 20th, 2005|
I am reliving 2 summers ago, wherein i listen to philip glass and cry all day. and by cry i mean chainsmoke. fuck that noise! i welcome fall with open arms. and i welcome jennifer aniston with open legs. i am truly a hollowed out shell of my former crab. want some cheese with that wane? then read my new thing
|Tuesday, July 19th, 2005|
last year my grandfather took me in the basement and told me he wanted to give me something he'd been waiting all my life to give me. i was expecting some really ornate, ugly gold jewelry. instead he gave me an 8-track cassette of the soundtrack to the godfather part two. then he immediately took it back and told me that i was not yet mature enough to take over the roll of caretaker for the aforementioned 8-track cassette.
|Thursday, July 7th, 2005|
|eating habits: a list
i love spaghetti but CAN NOT eat linguine. i have had diner waitresses tell me it's the same, but you see, flat spaghetti horrifies me.
i love cinnamon raisin bagels but must systematically pick out all of the raisins
i eat extraordinarily slowly. usually because i will do things like eat corn one kernel at a time (same with peas), and rip up my bread into tiny pieces and then eat them one at a time
i always end up folding flat foods into quarters
i'm not sure where i was originally intending to go with this, but now i'm hungry
|Wednesday, July 6th, 2005|
|a short list
i like calling kidneys "kids"
i'm stuck in a loop of infinite regress. you've got teeth like a vicious infant, moonbeam.
i'm covering for my boss at work and he left bery bery BERY poor instructions and it's making my life a hell on earth. the longer i go between talking to my parents, the less horrible i feel about myself
it's 6:07, do you know where brett butler is?
|Thursday, June 30th, 2005|
there are a lot of things i dont like about the movie million dollar hotel
but the demented flirtation between jeremy davies and milla jovovich isn't one of them. it might actually be my favorite cinematic romantic development. ever.
|Monday, June 27th, 2005|
|my name is caroline and i remember everything
i just went back and read every single back entry of this journal because i am on an information gathering mission; my intent was to figure out what i want and apparently i am easy to please because the only recurring theme is that i am secretly very domestic and just want to own a fucking house with a porch, an idea which is reinforced by the fact that i spent about 12 hours a day watching various shows about architecture and real estate on cable this weekend. i pretty much missed pride and all that comes along with pride weekend- even the mermaid parade. i wasn't feeling well or feeling like going out all that much. i am not incredibly happy right now and it is manifesting itself in a desire to sleep eat and watch tv, another pattern i recognize all too well. no, don't worry, i'm fine. it's just a very slight malaise. i really have nothing to complain about and should attempt not to make other peoples' problems about me, which is my tendency. i'm fine. i'm just, i don't know, sad? sad is better than what i was a year and a half ago. i'll take sad over paralyzed with depression any day.
in short, i am working the same job and living in the same place and doing very much the same things and it is very fucking hot out right now which i absolutely despise. i watched this show about "extreme homes of the frozen north" which pretty much made me want to roll around in the snow. god that sounds so fucking nice right now
oh, and my ass is still in the air. always.
|Monday, June 13th, 2005|
|Monday, May 23rd, 2005|
it's been said numerous times that i seem very happy these days. it's true. mostly. if anything i feel more resilient. more able to cope with the perpetual stream of shit that is funneled directly into my life by some celestial shovel. i fall apart less easily. i tend towards an air of resignation now, instead of internally raging against what is or isn't fair. it's been said that i am in a short period of tumult and transition, astrologically speaking. a period that is connecting two much longer legs of my life. basically my job situation is sort of fucked. if i can't find another job on par with my current design position, then i'm moving when my lease runs out in 2006. if not sooner.
|Monday, March 28th, 2005|
|dear west coast
during the month of april i will be on the west coast floating around from city to city, drinking copious amounts of alcohol i'm sure. so IF you live in seattle, olympia, san francisco, LA, eugene,
or anywhere in between, let me know and i'll buy you a drink. and if you don't live on the other coast but know someone who is particularly fond of dancing and/or socializing with manic terrors like myself, let me know. for more intimate communications, my e-mail is email@example.com
|Sunday, February 27th, 2005|
lately life has been all about television show marathons (west wing, america's next top model season 3, etc) and stuffing as much food into my face as possible. talk about up shit's creek without a paddle with which to club one's self to death.
|Thursday, February 17th, 2005|
|hi hi hih hi hi hi hi hihi hi
L word premiere shindig at my apartment
in sunny greenpoint brooklyn.
i will provide snacks if you
post here for directions and such.
|Thursday, January 13th, 2005|
i floated through christmas on a cloud of vicodin atop a sea of red wine. it was the only way to soften the blow of a family with so many malfunctions, so many little things wrong that it's more cost efficient to burn it to the ground than attempt to repair. this summer it was time to cut the umbilical cord, which my family has taken as quite an insult. and they're going to punish me for it as long as they can. having severed financial ties with them, however, i'm much happier. it's like jennifer connelly says in labyrinth. "you have no power over me."
|Tuesday, January 11th, 2005|
|Monday, January 3rd, 2005|
i haven't written an entry in this thing for months. nothing really significant to update you on. my life pretty much consists of drinking as much as humanly possible & chain smoking mixed in with various poor decisions and regretable actions. i am not bragging about this, i am merely informing. i only work 3 days a week and my job affords me the luxury of being a complete lush 6 nights a week. i really don't have much else to say. something tells me there are clouds on the horizon, though.
|Monday, September 13th, 2004|
so this is what i look like now. fyi.